SPOnG just has to draw your attention to a cracking report on E3, written by one of Nintendo’s Zelda Booth Babes. And not only is the lady in question Yvonna Lynn, pretty damn smart, she’s also something of a looker. And she's a huge Miyamoto fan. Congratulations, Ms Lynn! You have just become SPOnG’s latest E3 2006 fantasy.
Speaking of being on the Zelda booth, Lynn says: "Nintendo recreated the environments of the game so that you could literally walk through them…If you were really lucky, like me, you got to talk with Shigeru Miyamoto. I just love him! This place must have been some sort of 'Magnet for greatness vortex'." SPOnG fell in love at the very moment we read this.
Lynn goes on to remind us that the life of the average booth babe is not all smiles and free cocaine at lavish after-parties, pointing out that, “...you may not know this, but many of us booth girls only get two 15 minute breaks and an hour for lunch. So, I cleverly cached my short breaks, added them to my lunch break, and viola! (sic) I had some time to sprint to that crazed place, the West Hall, to quickly take in all I could.” Bless.
“You may also want to keep in mind that these girls have been on their feet (often in heels and trust me, they get big kudos points for that) in the lights, smiling for 10 hours straight. So when some are snippy they may just be tired, not rude.” Aha! So that’s why they never respond favourably to SPOnG’s gentlemanly advances.
Lynn goes on to outline the ‘four categories’ of booth babes – speciality babes, scantily-clad babes, decently-dressed babes and bog standard regular babes - each of which can also be broken down into two straightforward sub-categories of cool and un-cool.
Lynn also notes that: “99.9% of booth babes would probably think a “...console is what you do for someone who is sad.”
Check out the full article right here for more tips on how to meet the E3 booth babe of your dreams. Oh, and Ms Lynn, if you are reading, SPOnG would very much like to interview you. There is a nice cosy Italian we know just off Sunset, perhaps you’d care to join us for dinner?
Speaking of being on the Zelda booth, Lynn says: "Nintendo recreated the environments of the game so that you could literally walk through them…If you were really lucky, like me, you got to talk with Shigeru Miyamoto. I just love him! This place must have been some sort of 'Magnet for greatness vortex'." SPOnG fell in love at the very moment we read this.
Lynn goes on to remind us that the life of the average booth babe is not all smiles and free cocaine at lavish after-parties, pointing out that, “...you may not know this, but many of us booth girls only get two 15 minute breaks and an hour for lunch. So, I cleverly cached my short breaks, added them to my lunch break, and viola! (sic) I had some time to sprint to that crazed place, the West Hall, to quickly take in all I could.” Bless.
“You may also want to keep in mind that these girls have been on their feet (often in heels and trust me, they get big kudos points for that) in the lights, smiling for 10 hours straight. So when some are snippy they may just be tired, not rude.” Aha! So that’s why they never respond favourably to SPOnG’s gentlemanly advances.
Lynn goes on to outline the ‘four categories’ of booth babes – speciality babes, scantily-clad babes, decently-dressed babes and bog standard regular babes - each of which can also be broken down into two straightforward sub-categories of cool and un-cool.
Lynn also notes that: “99.9% of booth babes would probably think a “...console is what you do for someone who is sad.”
Check out the full article right here for more tips on how to meet the E3 booth babe of your dreams. Oh, and Ms Lynn, if you are reading, SPOnG would very much like to interview you. There is a nice cosy Italian we know just off Sunset, perhaps you’d care to join us for dinner?
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Comments
majin dboy 30 Mar 2006 11:18
1/6
6.9/10
king skins 30 Mar 2006 11:40
2/6
fiddle
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micta 30 Mar 2006 14:40
3/6
looks like Jennifer Beals, smells like smoked sausage
SPInGSPOnG 30 Mar 2006 16:22
4/6
She SAYS "My goal for E3 2005 was simple…I wanted to find a way in. "
All she needed to do was ask one of the hundreds of thousands of 16-year old CEO virgins.
All she needed to do was ask one of the hundreds of thousands of 16-year old CEO virgins.
majin dboy 31 Mar 2006 13:18
5/6
SQUIRT.
yvonna 1 Apr 2006 15:30
6/6
awwww shucks guys!
no seriously... how sweet are y'all! I was so tickled to wake up this morning and see more than just a zillion "this webpage is down... hahaha" april fools jokes- hey wait! you guys were kidding about all that nice stuff, were ya?
naw, i'm sure not. I can tell it was genuine kindness.
thanks a bunch & yeah Myiamoto is adorable! I mean seriously... how could anyone look at that smile & not think he is just too cute.
That... and oh yeah- he is a frickin icon of epic proportion!
well I haven't had my morning starbucks & if ya knew me- you'd know i'm pretty much useless until i do.
So thank again. The article was much appreciated :)
no seriously... how sweet are y'all! I was so tickled to wake up this morning and see more than just a zillion "this webpage is down... hahaha" april fools jokes- hey wait! you guys were kidding about all that nice stuff, were ya?
naw, i'm sure not. I can tell it was genuine kindness.
thanks a bunch & yeah Myiamoto is adorable! I mean seriously... how could anyone look at that smile & not think he is just too cute.
That... and oh yeah- he is a frickin icon of epic proportion!
well I haven't had my morning starbucks & if ya knew me- you'd know i'm pretty much useless until i do.
So thank again. The article was much appreciated :)