Features// SPOnG's Top 5 Valentines' Day Games

Love Bites - 3D0
The Panasonic 3D0 was home to a lot of incredibly bad software. And I mean, really bad. Love Bites was an adult ‘game’ that wasn’t really a game at all. It was just a selection of poorly-directed softcore porn clips focusing on a mansion that has something to do with vampires. We know that much because the majority of the video focuses on the same gurning vamp-face of a Cher impersonator.

If you’re feeling lonely and need a bit of a laugh at the expense of video companies of the mid-1990s, then hunt down a copy of Love Bites. You’re guaranteed plenty of hilariously poor boob-gurn-boob-gurn action. You can’t even have a half-hearted pity wank over this. It’s horrifically shit. Even for a 3D0 title - I mean, at least Plumbers Don’t Wear Ties had ‘gameplay.’ And a hilarious ending.




Ico - PS2
The first of a trilogy of games from legendary Japanese developer Fumito Ueda, Ico did away with practically every kind of mainstream game convention at the time and featured gameplay with barely a premise. An imaginative, minimalistic take on the traditional “girl meets boy” concept, you play main protagonist Ico as he tries to save a mysterious girl named Yorda from shadow-like creatures.

It’s not only a haunting tale tackling the fear of the unknown, but also a deep take on the relationship between boy and girl, hero and damsel in distress, player and computer-controlled character. Almost the entire time you lead Yorda by the hand, and help defend her from all kinds of strange beasts. This is more a title for the gaming connoisseur to appreciate on this day.




We Love Katamari - PS2
The clue is in the name. There are very good reasons why everyone loves Katamari Damacy. It’s cool! It’s stylish! It teaches life lessons, maybe. Like… how best to roll up a boxy-looking cat? Either way, as the Prince, you roll around a large ball called a Katamari and aim to pick up all kinds of objects, creatures and structures in the world to create planets that appease the King of the Cosmos. Sounds bonkers? You bet it is.

This is actually the second game in the series, with the original PS2 classic unreleased outside of Japan. We Love Katamari was honoured with a small-time publication in Europe by Electronic Arts, and features the Prince darting around satisfying the requests of fans on Earth who absolutely adore Katamari Damacy. So if you want to imagine yourself as a Prince and have loads of people loving you right back for doing crazy shit, there’s none finer experience than We Love Katamari.

Any romance or love-inspired games you like that we might have missed? Let everyone know in the forum below!