Reviews// Canis Canem Edit (PS2)

Because, just like Grand Theft Auto before it, Canis Canem Edit is a great example of a sandbox-style game: strict guidelines are in place. But just like any other kid without a parent to tell them what to do, you can decide to do whatever you like to the contrary. The only difference is that these rules are crucial to Jimmy’s character, he’s not a bully at heart. So, while you have the ability to kick younger kids around just be aware that in doing so a beefy prefect is going to leap on you from thin air and beat the crap out of you.

You have a trouble meter that goes up in varying degrees, depending on the severity of your offence; and there is a vast level of temptation in Bullworth. You can choose to give kids wedgies, push them around, throw stink bombs and firecrackers in the toilets, or slide down banisters. Even skateboarding in the school is considered misconduct, and arming yourself with eggs and aiming at authority figures will get you done for impudence.

If you aim to be mischievous, make sure you can escape, particularly when out in the streets since cops can bust you as soon as they grab you. You’re punished after getting caught a few times, and will have to serve detention and carry out chores such as mowing the lawn. After familiarising yourself with the game (which Rockstar has done perfectly by offering tutorial missions that do anything but patronise) you can learn how to bend curfew and play truant with skill and panache. OK, maybe not so much panache.

The bulk of Canis Canem Edit lies within its huge stack of tasks, whether they are given to you by the headmaster or as a request for help by a fellow student. As Jimmy so correctly puts it, “Everyone in the school either wants your help, wants to beat you up, or both”. So, having dealt with bullies at other schools and being confident enough to stand up to wrongdoers, you get to earn money and other rewards if you manage to complete the task set. Yellow missions are used to progress through the chapters, but side-missions, paid jobs and challenges from various cliques offer more challenges should you wish to not blast through the story mode.

The missions are varied and entertaining, and are available at different times of the day. You even get different types of missions depending on what clique you are dealing with; these can happen not just in the school, but outside in the main city as well. For example, one main city task sees you having to clear a cinema queue because a prep girl wants to be first in line. In another mission a greaser kid suspects his girlfriend is cheating on him, requiring paparazzi skills with the camera (see, being a photojournalist does pay in gaming. Unless it’s Dead Rising, in that case you’re just unlucky).

The sheer size of the game world is breathtaking, especially considering that a bike or skateboard’s all you have to get around at first; there is the chance to grab a moped later on. Once you get outside the school gates, you can purchase items in shops, play arcade games, discover hidden items like cards and rubber bands (hey, they were useful when we were kids too) and get up to all sorts of new mischief. If you just can’t be bothered to do anything, you can also hang back and watch the city and Bullworth Academy students interact with each other: we’ve seen NPC kids get into fights, and prefects tackling them to the floor several times, and it never gets old to spectate. With so much on offer on such a grand scale, Canis Canem Edit has a hell of a lot of lasting value.

We can’t really avoid the politics here, so we’ll finish with one question to the detractors: If Canis Canem Edit really is a ‘Columbine Simulator’, then why does it place such high moral/ethical demands on Jimmy, its central character?

SPOnG Score: A-

This game is a fantastic tongue-in-cheek adventure through a part of life that pretty much everyone can relate to. It’s definitely not a revolution in Rockstar’s ‘sandbox’ style gameplay, but then when a game plays this good, who are we to complain? Gold Star to the Vancouver team.