PlayStation 3 Bug and Delay Claims Flare. From Nowhere at All...
Sony to miss spring launch mooted.
Reports hitting the Internet over the weekend claim that Sony Computer Entertainment is in dire straits, unable to cope with the PlayStation 3, asserting that the console will be both late and plagued with bugs.
Much of the uproar stems from amateur games site Kotaku, and upon closer inspection, fails to hold any significant weight. In fact, we'll be impressed if the site doesn't come under pressure from Sony, given that its claims - eagerly picked up on by a press sector with little to cover for a few weeks - stem from between nothing and very little.
The uproar stems from a person who (and where have we heard this before) is an insider who gets real, actual, hands-on time with the PlayStation 3. His message as reported on Kotaku reads:
“PS3 Info Before I Head Out Of Japan Friday Towards Noon, Thats Tokyo time. Have fun waiting a while longer boys. No way that thing is coming out in March. The games just arent there and lots of other isseus I cant delve into right now.”
It seems that Kokat... Tokaku... whatever, has been emailed by one of the trillion 'insiders' who unfailingly have in-depth, hands-on knowledge of an unreleased console and decide that emailing websites to tell them all about it is the best way to spend his time.
There's more however. Kotatu... Tukoki... whatever, posted a follow-up piece to lend weight to its initial article. The genius behind this is so overwhelming, we feel it is essential reading. The site explains:
“We reported Friday about what a man named Fishie claimed was his first hand experience with what he called a very not-ready-for-prime-time Playstation 3. Today I’ve got an interesting conversation between an in-the-know and a friend that occurred a few months ago.”
It then, incredibly, posts a MSN Messenger conversation between two 'insiders' for your reading pleasure:
Of course, the reports cropping up in recent days stem from little more than developer and publisher unease at Sony's progress with its new home console, and delays have been widely mooted for months. The lack of rolling game footage has caused endless speculation on the subject of taming the Cell processor, and it seems that this chatter has spurred reports across the web that stem from very little of substance.
We believe it's highly likely that the PlayStation 3 will be delayed. We also believe that it will launch with a dire lack of software. However, aside from the off-the-record comments of developers (already in receipt of PlayStation 3 development kits) these assertions don't stem from any of the hundred or so 'insider' emails we receive on a weekly basis*. More the fact that it's completely fucking obvious.
*'Insiders' and those with a best friend who works at Company X in Japan. From now on, your emails must be accompanied by some sort of image to garner any sarcastic coverage on our pages.
Much of the uproar stems from amateur games site Kotaku, and upon closer inspection, fails to hold any significant weight. In fact, we'll be impressed if the site doesn't come under pressure from Sony, given that its claims - eagerly picked up on by a press sector with little to cover for a few weeks - stem from between nothing and very little.
The uproar stems from a person who (and where have we heard this before) is an insider who gets real, actual, hands-on time with the PlayStation 3. His message as reported on Kotaku reads:
“PS3 Info Before I Head Out Of Japan Friday Towards Noon, Thats Tokyo time. Have fun waiting a while longer boys. No way that thing is coming out in March. The games just arent there and lots of other isseus I cant delve into right now.”
It seems that Kokat... Tokaku... whatever, has been emailed by one of the trillion 'insiders' who unfailingly have in-depth, hands-on knowledge of an unreleased console and decide that emailing websites to tell them all about it is the best way to spend his time.
There's more however. Kotatu... Tukoki... whatever, posted a follow-up piece to lend weight to its initial article. The genius behind this is so overwhelming, we feel it is essential reading. The site explains:
“We reported Friday about what a man named Fishie claimed was his first hand experience with what he called a very not-ready-for-prime-time Playstation 3. Today I’ve got an interesting conversation between an in-the-know and a friend that occurred a few months ago.”
It then, incredibly, posts a MSN Messenger conversation between two 'insiders' for your reading pleasure:
In-the-know says:
Sony will have to scramble and scramble hard to make spring release
In-the-know says:
and in case they actually manage that their content will stink since all games are way too far off
Friend Mole says:
lol
Friend Mole says:
i thought it was easy to program for
Friend Mole says:
unreal enine demo
Friend Mole says:
that was up in no time
In-the-know says:
an engine demo is not a full featured game
In-the-know says:
a game needs testing and extensively so
In-the-know says:
suppose you have an engine that can render a thousand butterflies
Friend Mole says:
yea?
[NOTE: He was most likely talking about the Factor 5 dragon game ‘Lair’]
In-the-know says:
and can do that in hi def at 60fps
In-the-know says:
you make one of the butterflies fully controllable instead of random
In-the-know says:
and its still 60 fps
In-the-know says:
but suddenly the engine starts cracking even without touching a controller
In-the-know says:
then you need to start looking what code is making it behave that way
In-the-know says:
start optimizing and changing parameters so external shit doesn’t cause that sorta stuff
Friend Mole says:
hmmm
In-the-know says:
lemme give another example
In-the-know says:
You have a 350 horsepower engine
In-the-know says:
350hp in tests
In-the-know says:
put it in a car and use faulty screws
In-the-know says:
and the engine will tear your nice car apart
Friend Mole says:
hmm, are things that severe over in sonyland?
In-the-know says:
then just try to find out what is wrong
In-the-know says:
it’s that severe with every game
Friend Mole says:
wow
Friend Mole says:
do you think they foresaw these problems?
In-the-know says:
yah
Friend Mole says:
wow
In-the-know says:
I mean
In-the-know says:
its always like that
In-the-know says:
MS has the same problem
In-the-know says:
but Sony miscalculated the added complexity of the cell infrastructure and its adverse effects on development
Friend Mole says:
so what did MS do right where Sony misstepped?
In-the-know says:
MS did a shitload wrong as well
In-the-know says:
none of the early games really show of the XBox
Friend Mole says:
has to do with out of order processing?
In-the-know says:
that is giving them a big image problem right now with people calling it xbox 1.5
In-the-know says:
yah that too
Sony will have to scramble and scramble hard to make spring release
In-the-know says:
and in case they actually manage that their content will stink since all games are way too far off
Friend Mole says:
lol
Friend Mole says:
i thought it was easy to program for
Friend Mole says:
unreal enine demo
Friend Mole says:
that was up in no time
In-the-know says:
an engine demo is not a full featured game
In-the-know says:
a game needs testing and extensively so
In-the-know says:
suppose you have an engine that can render a thousand butterflies
Friend Mole says:
yea?
[NOTE: He was most likely talking about the Factor 5 dragon game ‘Lair’]
In-the-know says:
and can do that in hi def at 60fps
In-the-know says:
you make one of the butterflies fully controllable instead of random
In-the-know says:
and its still 60 fps
In-the-know says:
but suddenly the engine starts cracking even without touching a controller
In-the-know says:
then you need to start looking what code is making it behave that way
In-the-know says:
start optimizing and changing parameters so external shit doesn’t cause that sorta stuff
Friend Mole says:
hmmm
In-the-know says:
lemme give another example
In-the-know says:
You have a 350 horsepower engine
In-the-know says:
350hp in tests
In-the-know says:
put it in a car and use faulty screws
In-the-know says:
and the engine will tear your nice car apart
Friend Mole says:
hmm, are things that severe over in sonyland?
In-the-know says:
then just try to find out what is wrong
In-the-know says:
it’s that severe with every game
Friend Mole says:
wow
Friend Mole says:
do you think they foresaw these problems?
In-the-know says:
yah
Friend Mole says:
wow
In-the-know says:
I mean
In-the-know says:
its always like that
In-the-know says:
MS has the same problem
In-the-know says:
but Sony miscalculated the added complexity of the cell infrastructure and its adverse effects on development
Friend Mole says:
so what did MS do right where Sony misstepped?
In-the-know says:
MS did a shitload wrong as well
In-the-know says:
none of the early games really show of the XBox
Friend Mole says:
has to do with out of order processing?
In-the-know says:
that is giving them a big image problem right now with people calling it xbox 1.5
In-the-know says:
yah that too
Of course, the reports cropping up in recent days stem from little more than developer and publisher unease at Sony's progress with its new home console, and delays have been widely mooted for months. The lack of rolling game footage has caused endless speculation on the subject of taming the Cell processor, and it seems that this chatter has spurred reports across the web that stem from very little of substance.
We believe it's highly likely that the PlayStation 3 will be delayed. We also believe that it will launch with a dire lack of software. However, aside from the off-the-record comments of developers (already in receipt of PlayStation 3 development kits) these assertions don't stem from any of the hundred or so 'insider' emails we receive on a weekly basis*. More the fact that it's completely fucking obvious.
*'Insiders' and those with a best friend who works at Company X in Japan. From now on, your emails must be accompanied by some sort of image to garner any sarcastic coverage on our pages.
Companies:
Sony
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Comments
Funky 3 Jan 2006 13:05
1/6
This coming from a gaming community that though a nobbler was a Nintendo controller.
From that pic of the boomerang pad, it sorta looks like a cool Batman thing he throws up to climb up walls.
From that pic of the boomerang pad, it sorta looks like a cool Batman thing he throws up to climb up walls.
majin dboy 3 Jan 2006 14:27
2/6
that msn "conversation" made me laugh,ive never read such a scripted piece of tripe in my life.
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jodo4 3 Jan 2006 23:27
3/6
of course, look at how they talk all proper and so. when you im it's shrouded with u and i along with yo sup dawg, was up and all other sorts of nonsense, heck even I do it when I im people, too lazy as is everyone else, just because people arre talking about a pricey system doesn't mean they should talk like rich people.
realvictory 4 Jan 2006 00:42
4/6
"So, is there something wrong with the PS3?"
"Yes, mate, it's s**t," etc!
Listen, most people might use chav text message shorthand on MSN nowadays, because they're lame, but please don't insult all lazy or rich people. Innit, propa bl8ant m8, I no.
"Yes, mate, it's s**t," etc!
Listen, most people might use chav text message shorthand on MSN nowadays, because they're lame, but please don't insult all lazy or rich people. Innit, propa bl8ant m8, I no.
Thief 5 Jan 2006 10:08
5/6
Also, saying that since it's an IM conversation it has to use s**tty slang is completely retarded. I always use correct capitalization and *never* use "U" and other lame internet slang, and I'm sure there're more people like me out there.
OptimusP 5 Jan 2006 15:08
6/6
Well...actually... U is dutch and it's the polite form of "you"...so i use it...when typing dutch...which i don't do here though. Mabe if i'm mad and then i put dutch insults on these boards and laugh afterwards because no one understands it.