The Murdoch-owned chip paper, The Sun, is reporting that a youth has been shot in his home in the south London borough of Sydenham, "for his Xbox 360".
Apparently, three armed bandits "burst" into the unnamed victim's house and demanded that he hand over the Xbox 360 (which The Current Bun values at £280, so at least it wasn't a Core). Apparently a fight broke out and a 17-year old raider was stabbed. A gun was placed in the mouth of the victim who was then, in Sun-speak, shot at point blank range.
The organ then reports the local plod as stating: "It’s fortunate the young man who was shot didn’t die.” Shot at point blank range? In the mouth? It's a bloody miracle that the young man didn't die. Or maybe, just maybe the point-blankness of the description is slightly over-stated.
The final piece of Sun wonderfulness is that 'a source' its intrepid reporter spoke with analysed the situation as follows, “You’re talking somebody being robbed and shot in their home for a games console. It’s the sort of thing you’d expect in America, not here. The violence used was extreme.”
A 'source' we spoke to this morning said, "The three desperate criminals had obviously been observing the house for some time and had planned the Xbox 360 raid with precision. I've visited Sydenham and I've got to say that the Xbox 360 is the most valuable piece of property in the entire region. Yes, given the diet that the lads in Sydenham live on it would take three of them to lift the device and its power supply."
Our source is editorial director, Tim, who used to visit Sydenham back in the 1980s. We've no idea who The Sun spoke to.
We called Sydenham police this morning to confirm the story but - seriously now - it wasn't open. So, of course we called the New Scotland Yard press office, the nice young lady there had promised to get back to us with the actual detail.
Apparently, three armed bandits "burst" into the unnamed victim's house and demanded that he hand over the Xbox 360 (which The Current Bun values at £280, so at least it wasn't a Core). Apparently a fight broke out and a 17-year old raider was stabbed. A gun was placed in the mouth of the victim who was then, in Sun-speak, shot at point blank range.
The organ then reports the local plod as stating: "It’s fortunate the young man who was shot didn’t die.” Shot at point blank range? In the mouth? It's a bloody miracle that the young man didn't die. Or maybe, just maybe the point-blankness of the description is slightly over-stated.
The final piece of Sun wonderfulness is that 'a source' its intrepid reporter spoke with analysed the situation as follows, “You’re talking somebody being robbed and shot in their home for a games console. It’s the sort of thing you’d expect in America, not here. The violence used was extreme.”
A 'source' we spoke to this morning said, "The three desperate criminals had obviously been observing the house for some time and had planned the Xbox 360 raid with precision. I've visited Sydenham and I've got to say that the Xbox 360 is the most valuable piece of property in the entire region. Yes, given the diet that the lads in Sydenham live on it would take three of them to lift the device and its power supply."
Our source is editorial director, Tim, who used to visit Sydenham back in the 1980s. We've no idea who The Sun spoke to.
We called Sydenham police this morning to confirm the story but - seriously now - it wasn't open. So, of course we called the New Scotland Yard press office, the nice young lady there had promised to get back to us with the actual detail.
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Comments
reza 8 May 2007 09:35
1/5
I have an xbox 360, i like the console though im no obsessed fanboy. I agree with some of this article but I think Microsoft should not become complacent when it comes to Sony...remember how powerful the sony playstation brand is. Microsoft have worked hard to build up the xbox brand and have done a good job but need to work harder. One avenue is advertising, I feel it does not do enough. I was at my local cinema for the Spiderman 3 release, and you can imagine how many people went to and are going to see this film. I counted 3 Sony adverts and one Wii advert, and they were pretty good, but no Microsoft xbox 360 add. I live in the UK and even on the tv you see Sony and Wii adverts all the time but very few xbox ads. Microsoft need to advertise its console and games more, as well as its features like xbox live. This will help to drum up more interest and sales for the xbox 360. Sonys public media relations is excellent, MS need to pull their socks up here and appear to be a more people friendly company.
config 8 May 2007 09:51
2/5
eh?
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JK 8 May 2007 10:00
3/5
Hes right Microsoft needs more money!
thane_jaw 8 May 2007 10:00
4/5
Yes, MS should really be fitting crims out with weapons in order to promote the 360, I know that was the main reason I bought mine. There just isn't enough console related crime in the news these days and I think something should be done about it.
kibble 8 May 2007 10:23
5/5
thane_jaw wrote:
Yes, MS should really be fitting crims out with weapons in order to promote the 360, I know that was the main reason I bought mine. There just isn't enough console related crime in the news these days and I think something should be done about it.
They could create a gangster themed game and call "360 Percent: Bullet Poof"