Guys, it's time to celebrate the launch of Max Payne 3 with a melodramatic monologue over some in-game footage. Yup, that's right, we've got a launch trailer!
No, you can't actually get the game this week. It's not out for another eight days. That's just how things happen now.
"Time moves forward. Nothing changes..." Max says. If you were feeling glib, you might want to ask why you shouldn't just go back and play Max Payne 2. We're not feeling glib, obviously. Just watch it, why don't you?