We really tried to like Playboy: The Mansion, but unfortunately it’s far too bland. At first, the surprisingly strategic facia might raise hopes for a genuine puzzler, but dig a little deeper, and there’s a vacuum. As the loading screens profess with their nuggets of Playboy trivia, the magazine and its bunny symbol are internationally recognized cultural icons: but you’ll actually glean very little of that notorious flavour through the proceedings of this game. In fact, rather than making use of the license, it almost serves only as an advert for it - persistently trying to build some imagined history of unopposed respectability.
Regardless of criticism, Playboy: the Mansion is sure to shift a few copies on the basis of the name and the interminable plugging it's currently receiving in the multi-million selling magazine. To be fair, there are some who would really enjoy it. Because there’s not actually much tangible gameplay in the package, it’s a title which requires the player to invest all the creativity and effort. If you play it all through half-closed eyes, allowing your imagination to fill in the gaps of the numerous boring moments, you can extract a certain amount of fun. But ultimately, a video game should be built on much more than that.
Permatan Californian blondes and video games may be two of our most favourite things ever, but they just don’t work together in harmony. Admittedly, had it been Hello: the Mansion, it would have been an even less interesting prospect, but that’s not the point. The structure of the game is simply too flimsy, and the effort expended in bringing the Playboy brand to life is inadequate. That leaves an overwhelming sense of disappointment and leads us to a simple conclusion: you’d be far better off spending your moolah on a copy of The Sims 2 and a Playboy DVD. Only if you’re desperate to play a very slow game that details the less interesting aspects involved in publishing Playboy magazine should you consider this as a full-price release.
SPOnG Rating: C-
Playboy: The Mansion is a genius idea, but like the Heffster in 2005, it tires extremely quickly. There’s not enough bare flesh to snare Playboy readers and there’s not enough game to seduce potential publishing magnates. It certainly deserves some praise for daring to do something original in a way that few would have predicted: but unfortunately that doesn’t mean it’s that much fun.
