With the Xbox 360 generating about as many headlines for the auction insanity it's provoked in addition to any other aspect of its launch, we couldn’t resist bringing you
this listing for what purports to be a solid gold 24 karat faceplate.
The listing reads, “Up for auction is this one of a kind poor man's xbox 360 faceplate from a private seller who wishes to remain anonymous. As with anyone who has too much money than they know what to do with, he wishes to remain anonymous and avoid any questions concerning investments, loans, or other solicitations, so all questions will go through me. Bid with confidence - see my feedback of over 360 sales. Serious bidders only please!”
Of course, the world’s elite, having decided to fall head over heels with gaming, often cast solid gold peripherals then ask sellers of discount garage door components to hawk them on eBay. Happens all the time.
It continues, “This is a pure 999.9 solid gold "bar" that has been cast into the shape of a functional Xbox 360 face plate. The IR receiver, ports, and buttons are all functional! Half of the pictures show the plate by itself and the other half of pictures show the face with the buttons and port covers in place. Again, this is functional and will mount onto an Xbox 360 console. The weight of the gold by itself is approximately 900 grams. The face plate is immaculate with no scratches - mint condition! (no pun intended) The pictures do not do this item any justice. Truly a must see... and have!”
And more. “This thing is AMAZING! When my friend brought the plate over, there was this heavenly *clunk* sound that resonated through the house as it hit the counter top. MAN - I just wanted to grab it, whack him over the head with it, and run... My precious!!!! It was very strange to hold. As I looked at it, I saw a face plate, but it felt like I was holding an anchor. (Again, thoughts of whacking entered my mind.) By far the coolest part of this item is that it is functional... well maybe it's the second coolest part. Obviously the fact that it is 900 grams of solid gold is the coolest part. But what I mean is - this isn't a "museum" piece that just sits on the mantle... you actually use it! After all, it's the price of a man's toys, not his art, that separates him from the boys!”
Now for the best bits. The seller asserts that although is friend is a penny-pinching Scrooge, he runs matching Lamborghinis, yet values friendship over and above mortal objects.
“My friend is very unique. He is very frugal and clips coupons for Arby's beef and cheddar sandwiches and yet owns a matching pair of black and white Diablos because they, "look nice together like that don't they?", as he puts it. Just before he left with the plate I told him it must be nice to be so stinking rich to be able to afford these kinds of eccentric toys. He just smiled and chuckled saying, "I'm not rich... I'm poor. I'm a poor man. But I am rich in friends!" I guess I feel better about not whacking him on the head.”
So could it be real? According to the seller, it really is erm, real. Honest. “Understand that ultimately the winning bidder is going to receive this item and could easily have it verified for its authenticity. Is it worth it to me to uproot my family and leave the country with only $36,000 dollars?? That's not even an entire years income for me! No... I think I'll pass and send them the real thing, as I don't feel like going on the lamb (sic).”
We showed the auction to an expert in precious metals who simply commented, “It’s quite clearly a piece of sprayed plastic. The iridescence is akin to that of a high-quality spray, though could be leafed – however, that would take time. Of course, the key to this is the complete lack of hallmarks. There is no way on earth that any individual would melt down and cast almost a kilo of pure gold and not insist that it correctly marked and no craftsman that would leave the piece unmarked. Add to this that no legitimate seller would fail to point out said markings and you have a crook trying to cash in and head for the hills.”
SPOnG has contacted the seller regarding the listing and will report any feedback in this piece.